Definite Change...

Today was my appointment with my neurologist. I brought Chris with me for support (and just in case my brain didn't work correctly while I was trying to make my case). We met with the doctor and he asked how I was doing. I explained the depression, anxiety and confusion that I have felt since going on the medication and that I don't feel like myself anymore. I told him that my husband and children are suffering because I am not the person that I used to be and am down and irritable all the time. I let him know that I would rather not be on an anti-depressant to combat symptoms that I feel are caused by a medication.

He was great about listening to all of my concerns. He doesn't believe the medication I am taking is causing any of the side effects that I described. He did say that it will cause the confusion, memory loss, etc. that I have been dealing with since I went on the medication. That was no surprise to any of us.

After discussing symptoms, the doctor said that due to the fact that I have been seizure free for three and a half years he thinks that I am ready to taper off and stop taking my medication. If I remain seizure free he is not going to start me on another anti-seizure medication. He explained that many people who develop epilepsy when they are young will outgrow it.

So, I will be tapering off the medication over the next 20 days. During and after the 20 days are over I will have to watch for signs of seizures or auras. Of course, after the 20 days I will not be able to drive for 90 days. Chris and I are ok with the "no driving" thing. It will be difficult but we will get through it. I am a little fearful of the possibility of having seizures again. While I have never had a grand mal seizure there is still a possibility that I could develop generalized seizures without treatment. However there is a greater chance that I will have outgrown the seizures. If I do feel the seizures coming back on then the doctor said we will find another medication but he will not put me back on my current medication.

I know God has a plan for me and that He is in control. Please keep us in prayer as we go through this change. It will be really great to be myself again.